Archive for February, 2009


Final visit to the oncologist

February 27, 2009

Today marked the final visit to the oncologist, short of a specific need coming up in the future. The swollen right leg and foot was addressed and the doctor thinks there could possibly be a clot in there, but can’t be certain. Bill more or less declined further action or investigation, a sign that he’s becoming less willing to fight through anything. The other bit of advice offered by the doctor was to set up hospice now rather than later when things became more complicated. Bill wasn’t very thrilled by the notion, but he was more receptive when told it would be just as much for Pat as it was for him.

Bill’s interest in food is diminishing at an alarming rate. Coupled with increasing desire for sleep, we’re fairly certain the cancer is progressing but none of us knows how quickly or how badly.

A Social Security visit is in the works for tomorrow so that disability can be set up appropriately. The office works a tad more swiftly when you inform them it’s in response to a terminal illness. Pat didn’t know there was a Social Security office in Kissimmee – neither did I.

Bill’s ability to walk on his own seems to be quickly fading. This evening Pat followed him to the bathroom, witnessing his legs getting shaky and his balance crumbling. She did her best to hold him steady and keep him upright. Shortly after it seemed to have subsided, Bill took a step forward and fell down. Pat was unable to stop it despite her attempts to do so. He sprained his wrist and scraped his knee mildly from the fall. He wasn’t able to get back up again, so Pat suggested he scoot along the floor until he reached the bed where he could lift himself into it. That was exceptionally tiring for him.

Pat’s new policy for Bill is in effect: if he’s tired and needs to go to the bathroom or to the bedroom, he’s going in the wheelchair.


A new development

February 22, 2009

Pat noticed that Bill’s right leg is starting to swell. From about the knee down to his foot, as best she can see. An upcoming doctor’s visit might yield more information about it but for right now it’s too new to tell for sure.


It’s a small world

February 20, 2009

A co-worker of Pat’s named Mark had mentioned what we have been going through to another woman named Dottie, the building receptionist. Dottie wanted to speak to Pat about what dad has, so she met with her on the way into the building. When Dottie asked where Pat had gotten most of her information, she mentioned a website called Dottie had an odd, almost stunned look on her face.

She asked Pat to step around the desk to see the computer screen, having just pulled up that same website. Dottie said, “That’s my daughter” (authoring the website) and the website was about her husband.

Shortly after the surprising discovery, they shared a tearful embrace.


A few good days

February 14, 2009

Bill was lucky enough to enjoy a number of good days. Outside of his now normal drowsiness and lack of overall focus, he kept it together enough to help Pat participate in the annual Great Backyard Bird Count. It’s a tradition at the Gose household and even now they wouldn’t go without doing their part. Good weather was abundant during the bird watching on the 13th.

On the 14th, Bill slept for nearly 11 hours but felt pretty good by the time he woke up. The hours in which he dedicates to sleep are slowly increasing. He was a little shaky moving in and out of Pat’s car on their way for food in the afternoon, but it passed and he was moving on his own again. Given the circumstances, this Valentine’s Day turned out to be pretty enjoyable, feasting upon the goods offered up by Smokey Bones.


The first headache

February 11, 2009

Last night Bill experienced his first headache during the evening hours. It kept him up for most of the night and did not pass until later the next morning.